alpinewriter:

one-time-i-dreamt:

I was hanging around at my boyfriend’s place (in hindsight he was probably Satan) and we were just chilling, doing normal things, when a long, sleek, black car pulled up outside of his house. My boyfriend, suddenly very nervous and twitchy, told me to go and hide in the closet. When I asked him what was up, he just told me it was a “work associate” so I went and did as he said. I peeked a little bit out of the closet to see who this person was. I wanted to see who could possibly get my boyfriend, the actual Devil, to tremble in fear. And lo and behold, it was Ted Cruz.

Reflections on this post:

1. I need to read URLs.

2. “in hindsight he was probably Satan” may be the single greatest hook to a story that I’ve ever seen.

3. The levels of stress and suspense that occur in the rising action here rival that of some of the greatest survival horror works that exist on this earth.

4. “And lo and behold, it was Ted Cruz” is probably the only sentence that could make the conclusion to this story more terrifying, and ended the story in a way far superior to anything my own sense of dread could have come up with.

(via the-glitter-clitoris2)

clonehub:

free-spoons:

forcedintostarwars:

Remember when that guy in The Clone Wars was like “Checkmate! Everyone here is A Good Person and only A Bad Person would kill me!” and then Anakin ‘Stabs-a-lot’ Skywalker stabbed him and the imperial march played?

Lordy goats alive, that scene alone should have ensured that show get renewed for 34 seasons right then and there no questions asked

here’s the scene, its great

this is the only time im saying this: anakin was right

(via the-glitter-clitoris2)

momo-de-avis:

erikkillmongerdontpullout:

erikkillmongerdontpullout:

Huh…

This is Matrix in a matrix read this shit because it’s talking about how Bandersnatch can be used to create an even more complex user profile depending on how you interacted with the movie, what choices you picked, and how many times you went through a certain path….IM SHOOK

black mirror becomes its worst nightmare

(via triiiangulum)

dragon-in-a-fez:

adonis-xx:

dragon-in-a-fez:

dragon-in-a-fez:

I swiped my credit card on this vending machine and it said “no sale” and just spat out a dollar bill at me??

reblog the Money Dollar and a vending machine will bless you with miniscule wealth and extreme confusion

I don’t believe this. This machine looks far too archaic to have a Card Reader. You all are being sold lies.

why does everyone on this site think they’re the fucking mythbusters

(via fancynewaddress)